The Snack Machine
by Minnet
Summary: Directly related to Missing Cards. Xigbar comes back from interior design night classes, irritates Marluxia, and finds Luxord's cards in a snack machine. Oneshot. Rated for language.


**Directly related to _Missing Cards._**

This is a one-shot concerning what happened when Xigbar went to the snack machines and before. I just read the fourth chapter of _Missing Cards _and I couldn't stop giggling. Jeez, I can't believe I wrote that. Well, the part with Xigbar made me laugh.

I don't own _Kingdom Hearts, _and that makes me pout. There will be out of characterness, I think.

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Xigbar had just gotten back from his interior design course at the local community college. He was taking night classes, which means they went on all the time, except during the day. Get it? 'Cause ya see, it's always night. Haha, ha, ha… _Anyways_. Everybody's favorite old man surfer-dude was taking interior design courses because Xemnas made him. According to The Superior, 'color-coordination was a very important part of being a Nobody and being able to live in Castle Oblivion'. Yes, Xigbar used to have a horrible sense of color-coordination, almost as bad as Axel's. In fact, he 'matched' brown-grey with slate in his bedroom, and then had white-grey and orange bed sheets. O, yeah, he needed help.

That's where the interior design courses came in. Xigbar passed with flying colors. In fact, he was then one of the most highly recommended designers **in **The World That Never Was. This was the particular day (night) he came back from them, and he seemed somewhat different. More cheery than he used to be; maybe even a better person. Right. He was still a selfish bastard, just not as much. To the plot, we go!

**X**_x_**X**_x_**X**_x_**X**_x_**X**_x_**X**_x_**X**

Xigbar had just returned home (for good) from the wretched community college. He may have learned a lot about how to match colors and design rooms to look nice, but he still hated the classes, his fellow students, and even the building. He walked through the lobby of Castle Oblivion, down some random hallways, and into the kitchen, where he saw Marluxia making himself a cappuccino. Not a _real _cappuccino, but _instant _cappuccino.

"Hey, Marly! What is up?" Number II asked his comrade while walking over to lean on the counter next to him.

"Don't call me 'Marly', I don't like it and you know that," Marluxia replied in a rude manner. "And nothing is up, other than I'm obviously making a cappuccino."

"Ah, I see. You need something to wake ya up, right? Larxene keep you up all night?" Xigbar smirked and nudged the younger man, who shot him a disgusted look.

"You're **very **funny," the younger man drawled while rolling his eyes.

"Aww, c'mon dude, we all know you like her. Well, about as much as a Nobody can like someone…" Xigbar looked up at the ceiling with a thoughtful look on his face and then snapped out of that. Marluxia was eyeing him with a perturbed expression on his face. "Anyways, I see how you eye her and notice how much time you spend with her… But, then again, Zexion and Lexaeus have been spending time together lately, too…"

"Okay, '_duuuuuude_', I don't like Larxene. Nobodies can't like others, they don't have emotions. I wouldn't like her anyways, 'cause she's a sadistic bitch." Marluxia took a sip of his cappuccino, smiled warmly at the taste (for Marly loved his English toffee cappuccino), licked the foam off his lip, savored the flavor some more, and then gave Xigbar a dirty look. Xigbar just raised his left eyebrow at this. "Zexion and Lexaeus are working on some type of experiment."

"Alrighty, then, I didn't ask, though." Xigbar shrugged, and then jumped, turned to face Marluxia, while still in the air, grabbed his shoulders and gave him a strangely creepy smile.

"What the Hell are you looking at me like that for?" asked the rather freaked out Graceful Assassin.

"GUESS WHAT!" Xigbar yelled at him/commanded.

"What do you want, Xigbar?" Marluxia was getting **slightly **frustrated. Xigbar was keeping him from his precious cappuccino/caffeine. Soon, he was gonna have to throw a hissy fit if he didn't get to finish it in the near future.

"Dude. No. I told you to guess."

"Did Demyx finally agree to go out with you?" the pink-haired man stated, looking at the ceiling and waving his arm, smiling.

"Fuck you, man. You know I'm not like that. Although… I wouldn't really mind seeing Larxene in the shower…" Xigbar smiled, and had a far off look on his face. "Even if she is psychotic…"

Marluxia frowned. "You're… different."

"Whatever… You know you like those thoughts. Now, just guess!" he said, becoming impatient.

"If I guess again, will you leave me alone?" Marluxia asked, smirking. Xigbar straigtened up and crossed his stick-thin arms over his chest.

"I might."

"Whatever. Lemme think… Hhhh… Did Axel burn up my garden?"

"Hah! No. That'd be funny, though…" Xigbar's mouth formed a devious smirk. "Sigh. Fine! I'll tell you!" The Freeshooter shuffled his feet a little and uncrossed his arms, then threw them in the air in joy. "I don't have to go to those fucking stupid interior design courses anymore!"

"Is that it?" Marly shifted his weight to his right foot and crossed his arms.

"Well, yeah. I mean, I hated those stupid classes and my classmates. All of them were stupid as shit."

"O, well, then. I guessed again, you told me what was up, so I guess that means you'll be leaving me alone, now!" Marluxia said in a strangely sweet voice.

"As if! I could stay here and bother you all I want 'cause I'm your superior and you can't complain!" Xigbar told the younger man and grinned evilly. The Graceful Assassin cringed before taking a sip of his cappuccino. "Unfortunately for you, though, I have to go work on redecorating my room. I'm really close to being finished. Soon, it'll match as nicely as yours does." Xigbar then patted Marluxia on the head and walked out of the kitchen.

Marluxia gave Xigbar's back a strange look, then sat down at the table with his cappuccino. "Jeez… that was pretty frickin' annoying. He's _so _irritating when he's excited. Almost as bad as Demyx and his goddamn sitar!" He then went on for a few minutes like that, talking to himself, until 1) his cappuccino was gone and 2) Saïx entered the kitchen collecting ingredients for a smoothie.

**X**_x_**X**_x_**X**_x_**X**_x_**X**_x_**X**_x_**X**

After he left the kitchen, Xigbar walked back down some random hallways, to the lobby where he saw the snack machines. He had the sudden urge to eat some gummi bears, because, unknown to most people, Xiggy has an unnatural love for the little bears. His favorite flavor is red bears. Yes, he really does love red bears. The Freeshooter walked over to the group of five snack machines and started looking for his bears. He looked in the first machine, but that was mainly chips. In the second machine he found cookies and the like. The third machine was a mix between cookies, chips, and gum. But, in the fourth machine, he found his gummi bears.

The only problem was that there was something in front of the bears. He recognized what was keeping him from his gummi bears: Luxord's cards? _Double-you tee eff? _he thought. Yes, he recognized them immediately. Well, for one, Luxord is about the only one in the Organization that _has _playing cards, but it was more than just that. He saw the familiar bloody fingerprint on the pack and few little spots from blood droplets. This was Luxord's favorite deck of cards.

"Um, no… Those shouldn't be there…" Xigbar was just going to look for gummi bears in the fifth machine, instead of going through the cards to get the bears, then he had a thought. _Well, Luxy's probably looking for these, or will be later. I should get them for him. _That's right, instead of being a complete dick and leaving them in there, for someone like Larxene or Axel to find, Xigbar saved the cards to take them to Luxord.

"I should drop these off in his room… But first! I have to finish redecorating my own! And maybe, later, I'll go down the canyon, across the valley, and through the forest of evil, evil trees to the Quikki Mart today… I could really go for some ice cream…" After those words, Xigbar took off up the stairs to his room. He was thinking about how lucky he was that he only needed to go up one flight of stairs to get to his room; unlike Luxord and Marluxia, who had to go almost all the way up the castle to get to their rooms.

**X**_x_**X**_x_**X**_x_**X**_x_**X**_x_**X**_x_**X**

Xigbar was in the upper floor of his room, rearranging furniture, when he heard the door open. He looked down from where he was moving a couch to face the upstairs window, and there was Luxord, entering his room. He sat down on another couch that he hadn't moved yet and watched the blonde look around his room; in the place he was sitting, anyone downstairs couldn't see him.

"Well now, going in someone's room without asking isn't very gentlemanly…" he mumbled to himself. After watching Luxord look around his room for a few minutes, he moved over to the railing. The floor squeaked and Number X looked up to where Xigbar was standing…

**X**_x_**X**_x_**X**_x_**X**_x_**X**_x_**X**_x_**X**

**The End.**

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And that was what happened with Xigbar when Luxord looked for his cards. What he did before he found them and how exactly he came upon them. There were so many references to the actual story in this. If you hadn't read the story, you should, then you might understand some of the stuff. Really. Or, ya know, don't.

Of course the Quikki Mart thing is in there.

Dude, this took me about three hours to write. It's not even as long as the actual chapters of the story and it took me that long.

Review, please. I'll love you forever, if you do. XD


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